Get The Strength To Say ‘No’ At Workplace

Notice each individual at your workplace and you will find they all live their lives in some way or the other. Some are proactive, some are lazy, some very boring, some commanding, distractive, talkative, and so on. However, all these individuals can be categorized under two general types. People in first category are those who permit themselves to go with the flow. Their life is generally influenced by other individuals like their parents, colleagues, seniors, soul mates, etc. Why do they live their life in such a manner? What do they lack? They lack something very significant which people in other category don’t. The strength of denying. The power to say ‘no’.

The individuals in this category choose to complete the project instead of discussing how Jenny passed out last weekend. They choose to eat quickly instead of extending the lunch time for a leisurely smoke. They choose to grow instead of waiting. They choose ‘No.’

So why is it that people in first category avoid ‘No’? It’s so simple. Just keep saying ‘No.’

I hope it was that simple. But the power comes when you say ‘No’ at the right time and not all people can do it. Why? Why is it so difficult to ‘No.?’

1. Because you want to grow

   Your senior wants a suggestion on how to implement the new policy. You are the first one to advice him, acknowledge him, reciprocate him. Advising is brilliant, but after you are done with your work.Next, there is a meeting in your department the attendance of which is optional. You are always present because you want to know what’s happening with the department. You want to learn new things. Learning is strength, but after you are done with your work.

   Your boss wants you to get a gift for her wife because today is their first wedding anniversary. How can you miss a golden opportunity to impress your boss? Impressing will definitely help, but after you are done with your work.

   In all the cases, you want to grow in your company. You want to do everything else but work. You think you are helping you colleague, getting noticed, impressing, and eventually making a difference.

2. Because you are helpful

   You always want to help your colleagues because you cannot resist the trauma they are going through. You have this craving to be known as an affable and tough guy who cannot see people caught up with some intricate dilemma. You don’t really mind what your colleague would think on helping him even when he doesn’t want you. You just want to be the one on whom people can depend on; the one who saves the world like Will Smith in Independence Day. You feel great when you mentally imagine people relying on you. The feeling, the imagining, makes you feel like man. Thus, to become manlier, you jump in every possible situation, even if you are making it worse.

3. Because you want to avoid your task

   Do you still keep wondering why you work is always left undone, even when you are always occupied with some work? That’s because you are doing something else. C’mon, lets face it. Notice yourself every minute at the workplace and you will find the truth. Your colleague wants you to help him with his project. You already hate you work, hence you quickly but unconsciously focus on your coworker’s project. Thirty minutes later, you are refreshed and you can now focus on your tasks. An hour before leaving, you check your ‘to do list’ and keep ticking what’s done and what’s to be added for the next day. Hurray! End of the day.

Ok. That’s how people in first category operate. However, what is the benefit of saying ‘No?’

1. Optimum utilization of your time

   You are always busy doing something. But is that ‘something’ really your work or even adding value to your work? There are hundreds of things that are urgent and you want to finish those first before starting your actual work. However, if you keep getting engrossed in such trivial matters daily, when will you start the real work? Here is when you need the strength to deny. Deny to what’s useless, say no to anything that keeps you from achieving your goal, say no to the little self inside you that wants to get out nd save the world.

2. Encourage colleagues to value your time

   You might have heard many quotes on ‘time’. Is it all true? Is time very precious? Who cares? You can care about it or not, time itself is very valuable. You can choose to utilize your time doing something important or choose to waste it. But remember, whatever you do every minute, every second is constantly building your career, your personality. These seconds and minutes constitute a month, year and your lifetime. It all depends on how you use it. Bill Gates, Barack Obama, and every other man had equal minutes in an hour. What you do in these sixty minutes is all that makes a difference.

   Getting recognition is simple. Finish your small project, ask for more work. Definitely if you ask for it, you will get more work. Keep doing more, keep getting additional responsibilities, and keep getting the recognition. However, are you sure that everything you are doing is important? Not really. You will get heaps of work if you search for it but choose to do what’s worth your effort and precious time. Or your boss will start dumping every other thing on you.

3. Make a Difference

   Heard of Stephen Covey? The author of 7 Habits of Highly Effective People and First Things First explains that 80% of your work and time contributes to nearly 20% of your task. However, the remaining 20% is given to the most important work. Some critical tasks are very important and you cannot, at any cost, afford to avoid it. This is where you need to work hard. Say no to the 80% trivial things and spare some extra time to work on the critical aspects. Stop wasting your time and work to get results. Don’t bother to get noticed by attending some creepy meetings. Instead, be the best by making extra time for most important tasks. Who wouldn’t notice you if you are the best performer of the year? Your boss can throw you out even if you got a gift for a wife. But he cannot afford to let you go if you achieve your targets.

But how do you learn to say no?

Don’t, I repeat, don’t focus on anything that’s trying to distract you from your actual work. Or look at it like this when you find yourself occupied with anything. Is it helping me shape my career? If yes, continue. If no, say ‘No.’ Is it helping me to achieve my targets? Is it of any use? Can I avoid this for my improvement? What will be the consequences of avoiding trivial matters?

Observe discipline

Once you decide that you would not focus on anything less important, stick to it. It would as difficult as trying to quit smoking. One drag can bring you back to two packs per day. Let people badmouth about you, let people be jealous of you, let people know you are working and do not like to be disturbed. Say ‘No’ to anything and everything that distracts you.

Choose where you want to be. First category or Second category?